161 Quotes By Mark Twain

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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain on government

Loyalty to the country always. Loyalty to the government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain on government

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one.
Mark Twain on great

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
Mark Twain on great

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
Mark Twain on great

My books are like water those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
Mark Twain on great

There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one - keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy.
Mark Twain on happiness

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
Mark Twain on health

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.
Mark Twain on health

The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.
Mark Twain on history

Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
Mark Twain on hope

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
Mark Twain on humor

Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
Mark Twain on humor

The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow there is no humor in Heaven.
Mark Twain on humor

Humor must not professedly teach and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever.
Mark Twain on humor

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
Mark Twain on imagination

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
Mark Twain on intelligence

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
Mark Twain on life

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
Mark Twain on life

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Mark Twain on life